Felt like Shit!

I felt like Shit earlier. Having to force myself to go through so much social pressure makes me feel like Shit! Forced to face him to pretend that last week was not his fault. It's just my personal matter. I made that decision because I don want to go through another round of social pressure from the manager if he choose to fight this out. Of course I'm more cleverer than him. Then the next social pressure to see my boss re some urgent matter. Which was just the declaration for travel which she discourage me from going but she signed and approve me of going anyway. Then she gave some lecture of how she don't see me during recess. She pretend to know when I mentioned during recess block I have ICS. Must be that jackass always there seen around her during recess and not me. And then how she wants me to provide interventions even with pupils with no diagnosis. In my heart I was telling myself this isn't what I signed up for. I'm outta here for good. So I braved up and tell her about my intention to transfer due to some personal reason I made up. I figured no point telling them off their system sucks and no support might as well quit or move. And later on meet vp to tell her the same things. Argh!!! Effects my mood terribly! I felt guilty for using force on my boys for not being able to control his self talk. I was so flustered end of the day I forced myself to workout at gym. And boy it did felt good. No social pressure. Just loud music in feeling the beat in my heart.